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Harringay, Haringey - So Good they Spelt it Twice!

 

Are you fed up with Tele marketeers?

 

Counterscript.pdf

 

http://egbg.home.xs4all.nl/counterscript.html

Tags for Forum Posts: consumer, issues, telemarketeers

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Amazing..

I find when I ask for name or phone no they put the phone down rather swiftly. Funny that.

I made a telesales chap cry once. I don't think I was any more abrupt with him than usual.

what did you say? Tell!!!!

Something along the lines of did he imagine that his life would turn out to consist of ringing up strangers to try and scam them when he was younger. Seemed to have struck a nerve. Honestly nowhere near as bad as some of the stuff I've said to others.

A friend suggested:

Do you have a family?  [answer is yes]

Would they be proud of the way you earn money?

Two forms of reply to this VERY amusing post. 

 

Point one 'Stwing da bu**ers along' is a good tactic. I had one recently from an african call centre promising to enter me into a lottery. As it happened, I had nothing better to do and I knew they were a fake, because I told them they'd got the wrong person and that my name was actually Farr-Kew and my first initial was O. 

 

So then he went into his pitch constantly saying to me 'Mr O Farr-Kew this is such great opportunity". When it got to the payment bit, I kept reading him the telephone numbers off various estate agents boards I could see. Well that really got him. I then had the supervisor on and when I finally pointed out to him what my name meant, he went mad - it was great fun!  

@Veggie Reggie: LOVING YOUR WORK!

I actually have a very great deal of telephone experience and I do wonder sometimes if a book on the subject of callers and how to deal with them might not be worth putting out there in E-reader world!

Response 2: Chuggers

Chuggers are one of the curses of the modern age - and telephone chuggers are the worst. They basically only call existing supporters. Whats worse, is they pick on the families or sufferers of the disease they might might be trying to raise funds for. Its even worse with children's charities, because very often they will call up abuse victims - and are expected to deal with such issues and still get money out of the caller. 

 

The tell tale sign of a chugger is when they say 'I am calling on behalf of....' 

 

DON'T tell them to go away at this point.  They work to a set routine and until they hit you with it (or the campaign has finished), their computer systems will keep dialling your number. Registering with the Telephone Preference Service does not work with Chuggers because they have scripts to get around that, even though they are not supposed to. 

One sure way of getting rid of them is to play dead. If someone calls you up and says, "Can I speak to....?" ALWAYS ask who is calling. Never simply acknowledge you are the person until you have verified them.  ONce you have established they are a chugger, simply say "I'm sorry, but that person died a couple of days ago and the funeral is tomorrow" Then you say to them 'Have you marked that on your computer system so that we don't get any more calls, because this is very upsetting'.  They are bound to do this, and that should be that. 

 

Another tactic is to offer them money half way through their pitch. They work to a one, half and half again routine. So, if they originally ask for 12, they will then ask for 6, then for three. They MUST ask you for money three times and they are constantly listened into to ensure they do. 

However, the rule is that if you make THEM an offer before, they must accept it. So simply blurt out 'I'll give you 50 pence" they MUST accept it. They will then try to take the payment. You simply point out that your card has been left at work, so you will put a cheque in the post. That will be put down as a donation and they will leave you alone. 

 

If you want to waste their time, then keep them talking using open questions, but only ever answer THEIR open questions with closed ones - DON'T get involved in a conversation with them. Once they have done their 3 asks and you have said no, their system wipes you out. 

 

Chugging outfits exist because they make money. If for example, they say they are trying to raise £1m for the Elephant Toenail Relief Fund, that is based on the ASSUMPTION that each donor will keep their standing order or direct debit going for FOUR YEARS.  If for example, you pledge £10 a month for Bananas Anonymous, the charity won't start seeing any of it for about a year, because before that, the chuggers will be taking their cut. Thus, if you want to set up a regular donation, its best to do it directly with the charity. 

 

Similarly, if you are a charity and you seriously want to brass your supporters off, then by all means employ a chugging firm. 

 

 

 

 

Way back in the late 80's I worked in a call centre that sold advertising. Now, if you can stand it, selling advertising is VERY lucrative - especially in Commission Only houses. Sell space and our commission is 15%, which on a £2000 ad is very nice indeed. Sell two a week and you are doing very nicely. If they repeat the following year and you are still there, then you get 10%. But you do have to mind your p's and q's!. 

 

One old boy who'd worked for the firm for many years - and had earned enough money to buy LOADS of bedsits in Cricklewood and Kilburn - used to always use the same payoff line at the end of his pitch. 

 

It seemed to work very well, until one day. Into his pitch he flew and all was going well, so off he went into his payoff. "The cost of a full page advert in the Parliamentary Year Book is £2000, which is hardly an arm and a leg is it?"

 

At this point, the phone went dead. Thinking there was a technical problem, he tapped his phone, but to no avail. A call to IT produced nothing better. The problem was soon solved when he looked down at his contact sheet and realised that he'd been talking to the Chief Executive of The Limbless Ex-Serviceman's Association!

 

That is a very true story. 

If you really want to stop (most of) them calling the first place, register with http://www.tpsonline.org.uk/tps/index.html.  It's run by the Direct Marketing Association who maintain the Code of Conduct for that industry.  Within a month of registering, the vast majority of cold calls will dry up.  The DMA obviously can't control companies calling from outside the UK so all the useful stalling and rejection tactics mentioned elsewhere in this posting are worth hanging on to for those.

Absolutely right Justin, but it won't protect you from chuggers. They have an 'objection' script that deals with such things.

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